Chance to win: 5 out of 5. GUARANTEED.

Down that bucket 'o beer. The game is a gimme. Get hammered and watch MSU hammer its opponent.

Chance to win: 4 out of 5

We all want to be like Martha if she's drinking an Olde English 800 40-ouncer. MSU has a damn good chance to win, but it's not guaranteed.

Chance to win: 3 out of 5

Aaah, nothing better than a Mickey's 40-ouncer. Gotta love that Malt Liquor getting you tipsy. MSU is tipsy too; they might win -- they might not.

Chance to win: 2 out of 5

Doesn't that pitcher of beer look refreshing? You may need plenty of those after this game. MSU's got its work cut out to win this one.

Chance to win: 1 out of 5

The drinks are getting smaller and smaller; just like MSU's chances. They need some luck on their side and flawless play to win. Drink up.

Chance to win: NONE. 0 out of 5

How disappointing is it to go to a work luncheon at a bar and see everyone ordering Pepsi, while you are drooling as you stare at the taps? MSU has NO chance. Pepsi wins.